Two weeks had passed since my order from Woot! went through. Since then the anticipation has grown. Shipping has taken a long time, and with that I safely assume that the package must be big. It must be a big screen TV. It wouldn’t take this long otherwise. I diligently watch the FedEx tracker. Excitement grows even more as the status on the tracker now displays “out for delivery.” My Harrier Jet is on its way! The receptionist calls my phone to tell me a package is waiting for me at the front desk. She normally delivers the packages; it must be too big for her to move! I can’t wait to get my brand new 4-Wheeler courtesy of Woot! I nervously walk to the front desk and turn the corner to see!!! … … a small 1’ x 1.5’ x 8” package. There must be some mistake- this isn’t the nuclear submarine of my dreams. This is an ordinary looking package.
I walk back to my desk with the package and disappointedly open it. What did I buy for my $1 + $5 shipping. Oh look- a JVC digital video camera case. That’s useful! Now I have a place to store the JVC digital video camera I don’t own. There is something else too, a Go Duster. My interest dwindles until I skim the warning guide.
“Warning: Adult supervision required if used by children under 16.”
What sort of duster requires adult supervision for people under the age of 16? 16 year old kids can shoot firearms, drive 1-Ton Crew-Cab trucks down the road at 70 miles an hour, but they can’t operate this duster without adult supervision. My imagination immediately jumps to the extreme. This duster must be dangerous! Maybe someone could dramatically lose a limb while gently dusting their home or office workspace. I find some batteries for this death dealing contraption. Cross your fingers! I press the power button and the duster comes to ‘life.’ Wow… I’m pretty sure a 16 year old can manage this beast. In all reality I couldn’t see an infant actually getting hurt by this thing.
In the end, my Woot! experience didn’t net me a TV, a battleship, or anything of real value to me. It certainly didn’t deliver me a death-dealing power duster. You may be asking yourself, “What is the moral of this story?” well let me enlighten you. Don’t trust your hopes, dreams, or imagination. They are sure to let you down. At least when it comes to Woot!
Anyone need a JVC video camera case?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Hahahah, I thoroughly enjoyed that read. You should dust next to a long-haired coworkers head. I bet thats where the real damage happens.
Post a Comment